How Can Self Esteem Counseling Help Me Become My Own Best Friend?
Do you often berate or discount yourself?
Do you judge or punish yourself when you mess up?
Are you sometimes jealous of others and their accomplishments?
Do you have a hard time accepting yourself just as you are? Have you considered coming in for self esteem counseling?
Do you get worried or concerned about what others may think of you?
Do you want to hide sometimes? Do you feel like you need to apologize for the way you are? Do you find it hard to befriend yourself?
Sometimes it can be easier to love others than it is to love yourself. But do you know that you are the only person in the world that you will be relating to every minute of every day for the rest of your life? The relationship you have with yourself is by far the most important relationship you will ever have. If that is true, doesn’t it make sense to invest your time and focus in making the relationship you have with yourself the best it can be?
Many People Struggle With Low Self Esteem
Dr. Joe Rubino in the The Self Esteem Book says that 85% of the world’s population are affected by low self-esteem. Most people at some time in their life struggle with low self-esteem issues. The good news is that with the help of a skilled and experienced counselor, you can become your own best friend.
How Self Esteem Counseling Can Help You
Not knowing yourself as you really are is the fundamental cause of low self-esteem. Because IF you really knew yourself, you would love yourself.
You may say, “But I DO know myself and I don’t like what I see.” I would argue that if that is the case, then you are not seeing who you really are. You may well be relating to the conditioned self you grew up with and somehow adopted as your own. And that conditioned self has most likely overshadowed your real self. It is the reason you see yourself as unlovable. Perhaps you have developed the habit of trying to find love “out there” in someone or some thing, only to fail each time in the end. Perhaps you have experienced traumatic events from the past and the consequences of those events still weigh heavy upon you.
So how do you get to your authentic self? That’s where self esteem counseling could perhaps help you. A big part of the work I do would be in assisting you in letting go of your conditioned self while at the same time embracing your true self. I use gentle techniques that help you come to know who you truly are.
I have received training in the therapeutic modalities of Healing of the Memories, Integration Therapy, Focusing, Psychosynthesis, Gestalt, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Person Centered Listening, Child Within Re-Integration, Rephrasing Negative Self-Talk, Practicing the Divine Presence, and others. What works for someone else, may not work for you. We will work together to find the modalities that work FOR you. If you are a person of faith, I may suggest that you invite God to be your partner and to guide you in this process.
Once you see the beauty of who you really are, it becomes much easier to let go of your conditioned parts. Through a very natural process that is infused with compassion, you start to get to know your true self and your self-esteem grows, step by step.
In addition to all of the training I have received, I have personally recovered from low self esteem. I encountered a traumatic incident when I was 13 years old that suddenly shattered my self-image. Later in life I used all of the therapeutic modalities that I listed above (and others not listed) with myself and healed many of my self-esteem issues. My own healing experience has given me a lot of empathy for anyone who is suffering from a poor self-image. It has also given me an inside track to what does and does not work. In addition, I have had a lot of experience in assisting people from many walks of life in building up their self esteem. Remember, as a skilled and experienced counselor trained in self esteem counseling, I will be on your side guiding and supporting you all the way.
Learning To Parent Yourself Through Self Esteem Counseling
Your low self-esteem most likely has been with you from childhood. Perhaps you were raised by parents who, for whatever reasons, could not give you the love that you needed. You may think that you are stuck with your low self-esteem, but that does not have to be the case.
The good news is that you can learn to be the parent to yourself that you never had as a child. Part of what I do when I work with you is to model good parenting skills. As you learn to parent yourself through self esteem counseling, you will be able to fill in the gaps that you missed in childhood.
Healing of Memories
You may have bad memories from the past that still haunt you to this day. I am trained in techniques that will help you heal those memories of the past so that they have less and less influence on how you feel about yourself today.
The Truth About Worthiness
Are you worthy of all good things? Even though you would like to think that you are, your low self esteem is probably answering “no” to that question. And that is the kicker. How do you act as if you are worthy of all good things, when you are telling yourself that you are not worthy? Anyone who is experiencing a lack of love for themselves clearly, at some point in their life (probably during childhood) bought into a lie. And that lie keeps perpetuating itself until it is replaced by the truth. The truth is, you are worthy just because you are here. I will work with you to assist you in letting go of the lie, so that you move more into the truth about yourself. Living in the truth about who you are will automatically improve your self-esteem.
Using Doubt to Your Advantage
You may be doubting if any work we would do together could actually make a difference for you. The fact is, doubt and low self-esteem go hand in hand. Have you not found this to be true? The problem with doubt is that it can keep you stuck. As long as you doubt, you have a reason not to do. The way through doubt is to act. When you act, you can use doubt as a prover. You can say, “I am not sure if this will work, so I will lean into it and try it out. The experience of doing it will tell me if this will work or not.”
Frequently Asked Questions and Answers About Self Esteem Counseling
How can anyone other than myself help me feel better about myself?
I think that ultimately only YOU will be able to help you feel better about yourself. Most people learned to have low self-esteem from childhood role models like their parents or other significant relationships. In the same way, being around someone who models good self-esteem can be one of the methods you use to improve your own self-esteem.
How long will I need to see you to build my self-esteem?
The time-line for everyone is different, so I really can’t say for sure. Some people just need a little tweaking here and there and others need more in-depth work over a significant time period. That being said, the length of time you spend with me is entirely up to you. I think that you will come to a place where you will know when you are complete with the work we have done together.
How can I justify the cost involved in coming to see you?
Ultimately, coming to see me is an investment in yourself. Learning to love and value yourself more can pay big dividends. Good self esteem is tied to higher productivity and creativity, which in turn leads to greater abundance on many levels. And how do you put a price tag on that feeling of well being deep inside of yourself?
My FREE Offer to You
I know it can be challenging when you are dealing with low self-esteem to reach out and take some kind of action. So I am offering you a free 30 minute phone consultation. During this time on the phone, we can talk. You can ask me questions about my approach and share any concerns you have with me. It will be a time where you can get to know me and get a sense for yourself of how my approach might work for you. You can e-mail or call me at (303) 495-9086.